10 Dangerous Mistakes Men Make With Women and 5 Types of Ladies to Reconsider Dating

(If you want to get to the advice part and skip over the bit that explains why this got written, just scroll down until you see bold numbers).

I am writing this out of response to reading this.

I'll admit I only got to #1 and stopped after this jewel of an insightful disclaimer*:

IMPORTANT: Women are not called the weaker sex because their bones are not strong. It is because they have a lot of difficulty resisting evil. When you give a woman too much power, you will be disrespected mercilessly.

That's right ladies, we have more difficulty resisting evil and therefore deserve to be kept powerless or else MEN will get disrespected without mercy.

 (Oh, what a world! What a world!) 

Isn't there another story about an evil witch only with an apple...?

(Snow White...?)

No...that's not it...

(Eve from the Bible...?)

...Oh yeah, that's the one!

I wonder why women are so lousy at resisting evil? 

(I like to keep my men in a sealed jar when I have too much power.)

Especially when there's so much evidence of it in the world showing how easily women cave in to evil.  After all, we start wars and have humongous armies.  We have a tradition to uphold of raping and pillaging after those wars we wicked women wage as well.  We need to spread our eggs and take somebody else's shit and make it ours!  It's called Female Entitlement and is what Imperialism is based off of!  There's more females in positions of power, when it comes to being CEOs, business owners, and serving in governments and parliaments traditionally and worldwide, more women own more land, so no wonder, we've successfully polluted and poisoned the planet's air, soil, and water around the entire globe!  Good thing men have all the power and dominion over the earth instead, or man, one day we ladies could've really disrespected them!  Could you imagine that when just having to say "man", you had to include all the woe depraved women have caused? 

Did you know that some of the men in India are so worried about their male children getting gang raped to death by uncontrollable herds of immoral women, that they've formed a gang themselves that carries sticks around to beat these rapists since all those vile lazy female police officers with their guns do nothing to stop the rape epidemic that all the foul women who have caved into lechery against so many innocent boys have caused?

(Call themselves the Gulabi Gang, lookit all those men that have to protect their male children from all those disgusting women that have trouble resisting evil!)

Don't get me started on all those hundred or so male teenagers that got kidnapped from school in Chibok,Nigeria!  Did you hear about that army of women that kidnapped all those poor boys that just wanted to learn to read and think for themselves so they don't have to stay barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen--even if that's where those boys belong!!!  No doubt raping the boys and forcing and/or selling them into marriage or maybe even prostitution.  Thank Goddess, that some of them were smart enough to escape their tormentors.     

(They're gonna be okay, they just found out Twinkies are no longer being made.) 

Can't those dishonorable female captors that call themselves "Western Education Is Forbidden" see how terrified all these poor helpless boys are!  Sure, accept the Western guns but not literate boys, ladies why, oh, why, are you soooo evil and hypocritical!   

(They too, just found out Twinkies are no longer being made.) 

You might have seen the #BringBackOurGirls lately and wondered what it was all about - it's just nefarious women kidnapping delicate teenage boys that have a thirst for knowledge, while a female dominated media neglects to report at all or have on-going coverage of a female run government that has done absolutely nothing to search for and liberate these teen boys from their evil female captors.  Probably because it's just more of the same old same old.  Besides, can't have the mens watching this crap on TV in The States, they might get ideas and the dishes really need to be done!  Get back in the kitchen menfolk, where you indefinitely belong, and make me a goddamn sandwich!--PRONTO!  

(You know what happens after Mommy's been working hard all day and drinks after work.)

Think men would've learned by now how to cope and regain control over all the corrupt females in this world instead of just letting us run amok and destroy mankind.    

>...  d-_-b  ...<

Now menfolk, learn about some very real relationship killers that men are capable of when it comes to ruining a perfectly good relationship that the [evil] woman who broke up with you over [or you idiotically dumped over said infraction] didn't even want to have happen.  With a brief recap at the end of women that you probably really are better off NOT dating.

#1).  Putting Other Women Before Your Woman - 

This is a humongous mistake and should go without saying, that it's a real mood killer.  If you put the feelings and designs of your mother, your sister, your favorite aunt, that supposedly "crazy" ex on Facebook that you haven't even seen in over ten years, that chick you just met at a social gathering for only a second time that's already dating an acquaintance of yours that your woman legitimately didn't like, before hers?--she will not tolerate it for long, or even if she does, she'll eventually get exasperated by the ever growing list of all the other women you've encountered in your lives together that you've repeatedly demonstrated mean more to you than she does. 

She may have ways of coping with this infraction, that may not be so savory.  Such as upping the increase of flirtatious selfies on social media networks, calling on more of her male or female friends of hers to chat on the phone or even go hang out with.  This is the ultimate danger of not putting your woman first the majority of the time, she will tire quickly of playing second fiddle constantly, especially if it's to spoons, and will instead go seek out someone or someones that won't treat her like an inconvenience or an afterthought. 

And by the time you get your shit together and realize that she was the lady who meant the most to you, she'll be so disillusioned with you by that point - she's gone.

#2).  Doubting Her Intuition - 

That's not gonna win you brownie points brah.  If she tells you she's got a bad feeling about anything or anyone, it's not necessarily "just in her head".  If you continue doubting her intuition (or observations)--especially if in the past it was demonstrated repeatedly that she was actually right quite a few times--it won't be long until she's doubting her initial intuitions she had about you.  

You insult her tremendously by doubting her intuition, especially if you chalk up her real life gut instinct to a form of insanity or paranoid delusional schizophrenia and if you conveniently doubt her intuition mainly when it benefits you the most, well than, you're a transparent selfish asshole that isn't too hard for her to dissect and psychoanalyze now are ya?

#3).  You Don't Ask For Her Input On Major Decisions OR You Do Ask For Her Input And Ignore What She Said - 

Do not do this menfolk because it seriously fucking drives women nuts.  When you tell her that you're going to do a "poker night with da boyz" and she says, "Great!  Just don't drink and drive or loose more then $50-$100, and you shouldn't come home any later than 11:00PM since you have that big meeting at 9:00AM tomorrow."  And you outwardly agree with her but proceed to get a DUI and eventually come come -$500.00 or more, sometime after 2:00AM anyways?--don't be all shocked when she's majorly pissed off at you.  And for Christ's sake, DON'T CALL HER A NAG WHEN SHE WAS LEGITIMATELY TRYING TO LOOK OUT FOR YOUR BEST INTEREST. 

If she says she thinks the two of you can spend $150 and still get a perfectly decent TV instead of spending $500 on a TV y'all can't really afford, maybe listen to her, because then when the time comes to pay off your car loan--you won't be hitting her up for money and wondering why she's getting so pissed at you.   

Don't get a vasectomy without talking to her first, don't just quit your job because you felt like it that day, don't go buy a boat or a house or a car or even an engagement ring without running it by her first, don't decide to skip out on her colonoscopy recovery day to go see a Home Opener - without even asking her about how she feels about it first, because if you do not dudes and pull this truly inconsiderate and juvenile selfish bullshit don't be surprised when she explodes with rage.

(You'll see right through the pretty we paint on if you do and you will know terror.)

Some of you misguided bro-mans might not understand how #2 and #3 are actually tied closely in together but they ARE.  See, when you don't ask your partner how about she thinks and feels about things, on decisions you make and on the household money you may actually be wasting as opposed to spending--you express a multitude of negatives back to your lady.  It shows you are thoughtless when it comes to her thoughts, it shows you are more concerned about your own wants or needs than hers.

It shows that when the cards are down, you actually might not be that reliable or dependable.  It shows her that you're impulsive and weak willed.  It shows her that you're immature, selfish, careless, and depending on how profoundly a decision you made effected her, unkind.  It might scare her that you're actually bad at making major decisions and if she's actually good at making major decisions--you will freak her out, especially if you aren't taking her input to heart.  It also might show her that you're bad with money.  That doesn't mean she's a gold digger!  Money is how all of us get by!--if she's frugal, the two of you have children, and a mortgage OR if that's part of the mutual end game plans the two of you were supposed to have: a house and a kid; it shows her that if you don't ask for or care about her input now, what does that mean for your future selves or potential children?

Would you want to be with someone who never listens to you or takes your thoughts and feelings into account?   

This doesn't mean your partner controls everything you do, however, neither of you are single anymore and if any decision you are making can impact your partner--positively or adversely--than you need to tell them about it.  You need their input because what you do is also affecting them.  It's called having integrity and realizing how your actions impact others.  When you chronically are making decisions that benefit only you at the determent of your relationship that you have with another person, it'll only be a matter of time until your partner realizes the chronic fighting over your very real inconsideration, isn't worth the additional effort or stress to themselves.

(Fo' sho' - life's too short for nonsense cyclic fighting.)

     

#4).  Don't Let Externalities Have More Influence In Your Relationship Than The Two People Inside Of It -

This one happens a lot unfortunately and it needs to stop, it's costing people wonderful life partners over the temperaments of fair weather friends and borderline insane family members. 

Not everybody is going to love your partner as much as you do, in fact, a lot of people can be lecherous and jealous and petty when it comes to your relationship, especially if it transcends anything they've ever experienced.  It's one thing when your friends or family try looking out for you, but quite another when they meddle.  Especially if these are framily that you've helped move a few times but they've never helped you move.  The outside opinion of a womanizing alcoholic should mean jackshit when it comes to your relationship and you should be able to tell your framily member that and do it with zero risk at losing your relationship with them or else, that framily member's not real framily in the first place and couldn't have possibly had had that much regard for you if they'd so quickly write you off over your woman.  So the next time somebody wants to give their two cents on a situation they weren't present for, over a fight you two have already resolved, you know what you should say? 

Because these good fellas...

...ain't got nothin' on your good lady.  

Because when friends, family, neighbors, or otherwise are... 

...instead of being helpful and trying to find some common ground to clear up some kind of social misunderstanding through, you know, using actual words.  Or relying on secondhand information as being the truth instead of coming directly to you, then the next time they come at you, just let them know...

Because if you don't, you're gonna send a clear message to your partner that the gossip and triteness of others, means more than the solid foundation the two of you are supposed to have supposedly had.  

Nobody wants to build their house on some quicksand nor have it populated by a bunch of fake friends and moocher family members.  

Remember these few things before you write your girl off when she did something not nearly as bad as what other people have actually done:

It's possible that your woman even sensed the fakers in your life, but you were so busy disclaiming her thoughts, feelings, and instincts, that you shoved the realist person in your life out for other people like...

(Your bratty manipulative little sister who doesn't really give a shit about you at all.)

(Or that brother who only seems to think you're cool, when he needs something.)

(Or these idiots.)

(Yeah, you should really know how she feels about these idiots.)

It will get even more awkward for you bro-man when it becomes apparent as the years of your partnership wear on, you see that her family actually loves her unconditionally for very good reasons, that her friends go back over twenty years and she saw them through parent funerals and dissolved abusive marriages.  That she really is something special, that of course, people who are not so special aren't going to truly appreciate nor understand. 

So maybe instead of taking the side of the fakers, for once, take the side of your real lady who means you no harm or maleficence.  The lady that actually loves you like she loves her own framily.  Maybe, just maybe, that's more important at the end of the day and at the end of your collective life.

#5).  Lack Of Follow Through - 

(Whoops!--That circle of life certainly flat-lined.)

You gotta come through for us bro-mans, if you are nothing but constant disappointment and failure, when you create more burdens than solutions for your lady, when you do not keep your word, than it's...

...and you've effectively ruined a relationship you probably weren't mature enough to have in the first place, since you couldn't nurture it and lacked the wherewithal to back up your spoken words with integrity based actions. 

This could be as simple as not double checking the order included that favorite side sauce of hers (for the 20th time), or as complicated as you not finishing your PhD like you promised her you would. 

Lack of follow through is basically tempered incompetence, which means you're defective in some manner.  So mean what you say and do what you mean and she should forever treat you with the reverence you'd actually deserve, because you EARNED it.      

#6).  Being A Chronic Lair Or A Cheat - 

Nobody's perfect, sometimes people do lie and even cheat.  But bro-man, if you lie or cheat chronically, to the point where telling the truth is like a second underused language to you, that's a RED FLAG FOR HER TO GET OUT OF THE RELATIONSHIP IMMEDIATELY.  

You also probably need therapy to figure out all your compulsive lying and need for promiscuous sex.  

#7).  You Don't Forgive Her Sexual Transgressions - 

I hate this one because it's really a more complicated topic that deserves more than a blurb, but I can't tell you how many times I've heard that the wedding got called off because he found out his potential bride-to-be was cheating on him.

A lot of factors should be weighed before you write her completely off because women are sexual creatures as well and not your personal sex slaves bro-mens.  Sometimes when she cheats you need to look at your own shortcomings to determine why she even cheated in the first place.  When a woman cheats it's normally because she's unsatisfied or disappointed with some aspect of the relationship she has with you.  If she thought you were completely awful however and a total waste of her time - she would've dumped you in the first place. 

The fact that she didn't and merely only cheated on you means on some level, she really is fucking committed to you.  Especially if she TOLD you about it and apologized and never did it again, than she probably really is sorry and truly loves you.  You have to think about if you're pleasing her in bed, you have to think what you might've done to estrange her and push her towards another man.  You have to think about the circumstances of the cheating, not just that it happened, but why it did and if it will happen again, or what you can both accept about the situation to forgive each other, strengthen your bond, and move on.

It's almost like a reverse test--weather intentional or not--if she cheats on you and eventually gives a tearful confession and even bothers to explain why, for Christ's sake, listen to her, grow as a person, and if you really love this woman, don't crucify her and toss her aside for exercising a libido, maybe forgiving her would demonstrate to her, how fucking incredibility awesome you actually are.  Forgiveness is another way to say, "I love you."

Don't get played the fool, of course, but so many times I hear this tale and nobody bothers to bring up that the male in the relationship had previously been a virgin, or has some other sexual inexperience that would leave her sexuality frustrated.  Nobody brings up how he was physically and verbally and emotionally abusive to her.  Nobody brings up how he pushed her away, making her feel rejected or not sexy and she found acceptance or sexiness in the arms of another man. 

It always takes two to fucking tango.

So seriously, stop fretting over the "other penis" and fucking figure out how to sync up your steps, if you really do LOVE her.  Because the rhythm of life, slows for no person.  If she's good to you most of the time and made a human mistake, especially a mistake that's normally encouraged of MALES to make...rethink that anger or pride induced write-off.  Doesn't mean she should be sleeping with all of your framily and you condone it, it just means, maybe a one-time mistake is really just only that, a one-time mistake.  Weigh the situation, not your feelings, because if you scorn her and leave her due to one transgression, you might end up regretting your decision.  Temptation happens.  Doesn't mean you have to put a tombstone on forgiveness.    

#8).  You Put Her On Too High Of A Pedestal - 

There is so much pressure on American women to be "perfect".  But guess what?--we aren't fucking perfect.  So please bro-men and women, stop acting like we're supposed to be.

Females piss, shit, get zits, gain weight, fart, sweat, get bloated, have diarrhea, have menstrual cycles (which by the way, FED you in the womb you started as female in, so NOT GROSS), we fucking swear, lose our goddamn tempers, get aggressive, have bad hair days, cheat, lie, burn dinners, forget to run that errand, can't bake, don't want kids sometimes, etc., etc.

When you put a woman on the pedestal of Mother Goddess, or pretty pink princess, one day she's going to fall off that fucking pedestal and I assure you, her falling off of that mind's eye pedestal isn't her fault--it's yours for putting her on one.

Some misguided brah's might want to argue that all of this advice sounds like you need to put a woman on a pedestal to be happy in a relationship and you would be WRONG.  You need only put a woman on equal ground and give her the same consideration you'd give yourself, do that, and you should be a very happy man.

Every time I hear a guy whine about how thinking or hearing about a woman's bodily functions are "gross", I feel like screaming, "Haven't you ever read 'Everyone Poops'?!  Because everyone poops fellas.

So seriously, stop acting like females are plastic dolls when they're really just actually human.  Human like you.  Female like you...used to be.

#9).  You Have Too Many Vices - 

At some point it seems that dudes think they need to...

...apparently develop alcoholism to become a man?--this will ultimately ruin your relationship, marriage, family, life, and liver.  Slow your roll dudes and start taking care of your bodies better and get your priorities straight.  Ditch the negative self-annihilation.  Being drunk seriously doesn't make you cooler or more macho, it makes you more likely to do stupid shit.  Promise.  

Dudes also can translate this to drug use...

  

 ...fucking morons.  Seriously.  You waste your life, health, and money on addictions.  It clouds the mind more often than not and in later life, expect health issues from all the chemicals you stored in your body for nights you can't remember with people that you don't even talk to anymore.  Recreational drug use can expand the mind and of course, pot really is an amazing little plant, but when you do this shit (ie. designer drugs like molly, pain pills, acid, coke, meth, bath salts, etc.) in excess, and you haven't kicked your coke habit by age 40...maybe you seriously need fucking rehab before your son walks in on you snorting a line.    

Some dudes...

("Please ladies, keep it down some.")

...love on da lay-dees a wee too much.  Everything from being a womanizer to being a flirt to just being far too chatty with the cute young girls to being addicted to porn, seriously, just stop.  Obviously you feel like you need a woman to validate your manhood, either by using her as a sexual conquest or soothing your ego with some female attention.  This behavior will never score you brownie points with any females you are actually partnered up with and if you're too much of a glut (man-whore), you will become a carrier of a sexually transmittable disease and ain't nobody gonna wanna sleep with you.  Not to mention unwanted fatherhood being a very real possibility.

So man-up for real and try harder to keep your dick in your pants and your ego in the back of your brain.     

Than some dudes...

...gamble.

But the reality is, drinking, drugging, and obsessing over fucking to excess is ALL a gamble, and the longer you gamble against the odds, the more likely it is, that eventually...

...you fucking loose.  

Women will eventually leave a man that has too many vices, because it means you waste money, don't prioritize well, and you are too much of a high risk partner to contend the years with.  Honestly, this is true for any gender preference.  You don't want to date anyone with too many vices because you will never be first or even second priority to your partner - whatever vice or vices they have, will come first. 

#10).  You Collect Women On Social Networking Sites -   

It really shouldn't have to take a genius to tell you to NOT do this, but apparently, it needs to be said for I do see it happening far too often.

When you are in a committed long-term relationship and she questions you about why you sent that one chick in HR that was a pretty little idiot that you and your actual lady both know has absolutely nothing in common with you beyond sharing the same employer, a Facebook friend request, you either better fucking explain why, or make sure that shit never happens again.  For if it was as simple as "well we work together" but you're not sending a friend request to all the middle aged, over weight women you work with?--That lame ass excuse ain't gonna fly over any lady worthy of being with's head.  

Because I assure you, the woman you're with?--She's not stupid, and there's zero reason to keep tabs on the bitch from NYC that dumped your ass after two months well over eight years ago on Twitter but not follow your actual girlfriend's tweets.  There's NO reason for you to remain in contact with fringe women, or married exes, or your friend's ex-wife, or your little sister's 20 year old friends.  You don't need to see their fucking status feeds.  You don't need to "network" with them.  And if your lady says as much, it's not an issue of her "not trusting you" - it's an issue of you "not respecting her" because honestly, if you're in it for the long haul, there IS no fucking reason to keep contact with fringe women on social networking sites, you don't need to see their half naked drunken selfies, you don't need to know where they hang out on the regular, what their relationship statuses are, and they don't need to know details about the life you two are sharing either.

Respect her wishes, don't whine like a little boy, throw temper tantrums, and act like she doesn't trust you and expect to only just get your way - because you said so.  It merely shows her how despicable and selfish you can be, because if your intentions were actually so innocent, it wouldn't turn into a week's long fight, you wouldn't be getting so angry or telling her to "shut up" when all she's trying to do is point out how what you say vs your behavior isn't adding up, to her.  If following other women who have minimal interest in you that you may or may not still harbor lust or feelings for is more important to you than the woman who has accepted you completely and allowed you into her real actual life?--Maybe you should go back to being single and let her find someone that will fully commit to her and not hassle or argue with her when she makes a simple and genuinely reasonable request.  

So if she expresses that you being Facebook friends with the chick you had a crush on when you were 18 and worked at Target together with makes her arch a brow, and you're now 34 and you've been with your lady for over two years...FUCKING DO HER A SOLID AND DELETE YOUR OLD CRUSH!  

Which brings us gents, to...

5 Types Of Chicks You're Probably Better Off Not Dating!

#1).  The Narcissist -  

One of the nice things about social networking sites is that you get a feel for a person's depth of character better than you would by just talking to them.

If she's got tons of selfies up on her site and little else, chances are dudes, she ain't the girl for you.  There's a plethora of reasons for this...

...but the main one, is that she's way much too in love with herself and her own vanity to ever really be in love with you.

They say beauty's only skin deep for a perfectly good reason.

Also chicks that monopolize on their looks and/or body, have got to know, it's a diminishing return.  They're not going to handle the aging process very well and will turn to many potential suitors to reinforce the belief in how attractive they are - to perhaps your own chagrin and determent.

Instead, settle down with a woman who will age gracefully and feels like she only really needs to catch your eye.  

You will be a happier man and have a lot less drama in your life.

#2).  The Attention Whore -  

Another social networking warning sign would be that she's "friends" with almost or over a thousand people on social networking sites... 

...and she's not a blogger, stripper, actress, artist, musician, comedian, or in the limelight at all.  So chances are, she's either really fickle or bonds with people too quickly, in either case, she's shallow and immature.  She's over judging the intimacy of friendship and is thereby, watering down its meaning.

People aren't collector cards.  If she needs to have 20 likes or more on a random status post to feel loved or pretty or that she's having a good day, she ain't the girl for you either.  This is the type that not only causes drama, she invites it in and massages drama's shoulders.  

She'll also need male attention right in front of you IRL which isn't cute, it's highly disrespectful of you bro-man.  Egos cause trouble and need to be placed on the back burner most of the time.  If her ego trumps yours constantly, this means you don't matter to her as much as she matters to herself and honestly all the shit up top, goes both ways.  So if you feel like an accessory to her materialistic lifestyle, get the fuck out brah.  

#3).  The Party Girl -  

    

She might seem like a lot of fun at first, and exciting, but she's trouble.  

If your girl likes to party all the time and does little else, rethink why she's appealing to you or maybe do a much needed intervention.  She's living for speed and will either tire of you quickly or toy with you often.  Men and love are all blood-sport to the party girl.  Even though she's fun for now, she's not going to be very good relationship material in the long haul.  This is the chick that gets wasted at a bar and goes around making out with a dozen different guys while her fiance's on tour in Iraq.  

She's the one that might lift your wallet to go buy coke.  Just leave this one alone son and move on, she's got problems.  She's unpredictable and therefore dangerous.

#4).  The Nymphomaniac - 

  

Again dudes, she might seem like a real hot thrill, but chances are, that's ALL you are to HER.  She's a man eater and needs the D, craves the O-face, you are a pit stop on her next sexual conquest.  If you involve yourself with her, it's a huge gamble.  Now if she falls in love with you, awesome, have tons of sex per your mutual rules but if she meant for you to be just a one night stand?--Dude.  Just be another notch in her lipstick case or tread carefully. 

#5).  The Gold-digger -

I'm not going to lie for women or to men, this type of woman DOES exist but seriously aren't nearly as commonplace as society would have you imagine they are.  In my entire lifetime (12,000 days), I've only met two.  They're also very easy to spot.  These are the chicks that ask for name-brand gifts, these are the ladies that use sex as a reward system, these are the females that don't blush and balk when you spend money on them, these are the females that ask and expect you to spend money on them.

These are truly best avoided because they're straight up users that don't rise up and earn things on their own or will ever love a man for who he is but for how much he earns.

This woman will divorce you if you lose your six figure job or get cancer.  She is more of a con-artist than anything.

But dudes, look at yourselves for an instant and think carefully about the five types of women that were just listed to avoid.  

Because they are all symptoms of the patriarch.  They are the causalities of the patriarch.  YOU are a causality of the patriarch.  You can't marry, date, or talk to a female or think you're in love with her based solely on what she looks like and after only meeting her a few times.  If you fall into that trap, she didn't entrap you, you bought into it.  You might've even helped in contributing to the illusion and entrapping her own mind, the Narcissist-Attention-Whore-Party-Girl-Nymphomaniac-Gold-digger is the monster our Dr. Frankenstein society has helped create.  It's apart of the societal Munchausen Syndrome we all apparently seem to be suffering from severely.        

Value other things in females beyond their youth and looks and maybe everyone will stop being so fucking depressed and/or depressing.  An intelligent woman isn't to be feared, she's to be revered, even celebrated.  

Look for the woman that challenges you intellectually, that loves you unconditionally and DO RIGHT BY HER.  Love the children you two create, equally, boy and girl alike.   

Love her on the days she feels ugly because one day, you're gonna feel pretty fucking ugly yourself bro-man and you're gonna need her to tell you, how beautiful you've made life for her and how happy you've made her.  That you look handsome in that suit.  

Because love isn't something you can buy at the store in a pinch on a Tuesday night at 2:00AM, but you might run into it along the way; and love is like a baby that needs to be cherished and fed and reared by both biological parties, so the baby will grow up into something really special.  Something that has your eyes but her mouth.  Don't give up on love, but maybe grow more as a person before you ask her out purely based on how her hair looks in the light.

Know what I mean, Vern?

*Eventually I did read the entire thing and have no idea how it was found, except that the tittle matched the exact wordage of what I had Googled.