The #AfterSex Selfie: Is It Pushing Digital Boundaries on the Topic Of Love?

One of the new trends on Instagram is posting a selfie of you and your lover post-coitus with the hash-tag #aftersex.

Had you been unaware of this phenomena previously, most likely, as well as understandably, your initial reaction may be one of shock and disbelief at first. Albeit after looking at a few examples, it's actually very touching. Everything from the more tender moments of young or true love to humorous displays of affection, it is, a uniquely human face on sex that can't be denied:

Maybe it's because I've only been exposed to a smaller tamer portion of the #aftersex selfie but overall, it seems to be very artful. Part of the human experience is investigation and creativity. This appears to just be an extension of those traits we already possess, behaviors we already do (after-all if not for an act of sex, none of us would even be here), and a vehicle of shared experiences and expressions that had it not been for current technologies, we'd be unable to share.

We can't put the #aftersex selfie in the same vein of a creepshot or Revenge Porn and therefore cannot equate it to that type of invasive imagery, so this is not erape. As long as they are displayed modestly, the sex portion is overwhelming left to the imagination in these self-portraits - if you even want to bother to imagine it. Despite the hash-tag, it transcends sex to a degree, it shows you what's leftover when the sex is done. Which pornography never shows beyond the 'money shot'. So we can't equate it to porn either!

Some have decried the #aftersex selfie as being 'over-share' or just another symptom of porn culture, but I would argue it's actually a response to the prevalent porn culture. And honestly, if it's going to be SO ridiculously easy to access pornographic images on the web, what else could this type of graphic self portrait be other than a counterweight to that fact? There's plenty of gay and lesbian couples posting their #aftersex selfies as well and they display the same kind of love in their afterglow as any heterosexual couple would and it seems those that don't yet understand love is love would benefit from seeing such photos. Unlike so-called 'Amateur Porn' (the reality show version of porn) this is actual reality being documented and the portion of sex that matters most - what happens immediately afterward.

A 'selfie' is a spin-off on a traditional self-portrait, but is instead taken by the supposedly novice photographer, and is typically done as a form of bragging that comes across as a selfish or narcissistic act most of the time; available for immediate distribution, it is a form of self-promotion but also a form of self-preservation. It helps us achieve feelings of notoriety, celebrity, and immortality. But that is not the only reason or outcome of the selfie. Feel free to watch the following short videos that explore the topic of the selfie more:

Let's also not forget those on the other side of the digital divide still who don't care what a selfie even is, let alone what #aftersex selfies are. This is purely a pop culture phenomena that only those with enough disposable income get to partake in. Which might be why secretly we tend to disapprove them, not everyone's able to take a glamorous selfie. With all the filters and effects available to us, even the various angles to take them by, selfies can also present a non-reality. To the point where instead of showing ourselves, we're actually obscuring ourselves.

We shouldn't be really surprised that selfies mutated a #aftersex version and it is most likely that they are now here to stay, if we like it or not.

Reading these three articles on the topic really got my wheels turning.

It seems the real issue is social acceptance when it comes to the #aftersex selfie, however, the real questions are should it even be socially acceptable?--and--if it wasn't for prevalent porn access, celebrity worship, and a hyper-sexual media, would they even be getting taken in the first place?

After all, our own president took a selfie at a funeral, so is there really ever a bad time to take a selfie?

America has a very reactionary culture, we don't have a Philosopher King conducting lengthy discussions with academics about the potential effects of our technologies, their benefits or fallout. I personally find lovemaking a far too intimate act to share such a picture world wide publicly and one wonders if a person who posts too many of these with too many featured partners would get tagged as a sexual hazard. Being promiscuous may not automatically make you a slut or glut (guy slut), but it will certainly make you more susceptible to some very real STDs and STIs that no filter will ever hide.

Also all of these selfies ultimately don't belong to the person taking them as the documentary 'Terms And Conditions May Apply' exposes:

Ultimately a 'selfie' is the essential self reflection of the collective and it is up to the individual to discern whether or not the picture they're taking is doing harm or doing good, not only to/for themselves but to/for others.

So what do you think?--is this something you would do, want to see, or want your kids to do or see? Have you already taken an #aftersex selfie, if so, why, and did you regret it? Did taking one prevent you from getting a job or embarking safely in a new relationship? Is the #aftersex selfie a portrait of free love, a quiet protest against the loveless porn industry that makes sex a commodity?--or is it merely an outgrowth of that industry? Is this just more proof of the pornification of our culture? Is it simply the behavior of the ignorant and thoughtless or is this the new face of young love?

Leave your comments below!

'Cause I gotta go, I need to take a selfie.